Tuesday, March 27, 2007

STUPID QUESTIONS

My sister was talking to me about one of my previous blogs titled "Dumb Questions." During our conversation she thought of and mentioned a classic stupid question, but I forgot what it was, durn it. I am inviting her to add her question to this list by a comment at the end, and I am inviting anyone else to do the same. Here is the complete and unabridged version of the book my fifth graders and I wrote.


STUPID QUESTIONS

BY MR. R. AND HIS STUDENTS


"WHO IS BURIED IN GRANT'S TOMB?"

"HOW MANY COOKIES ARE THERE IN ONE DOZEN?"

"HOW MUCH DOES THE MEAT IN A MCDONALD'S QUARTER POUNDER WEIGH?"

"HOW OLD IS YOUR THREE YEAR OLD SISTER?"

"HOW MUCH DO THE THIRTY-NINE CENT STAMPS COST?"

"IS YOUR BROTHER A BOY OR A GIRL?"

"IS THAT A DOG BARKING?"

(SPOKEN BY A "SALES ASSOCIATE" WITH A HUGE NAME TAG ON HIS SHIRT) "HOW DID YOU KNOW MY NAME?"

"HOW LONG DOES THE TV SHOW '60 MINUTES' LAST?"

"WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?"

"WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE COMPANY THAT MAKES CAMPBELL'S SOUP?"

"WHERE DID THE BOSTON TEA PARTY TAKE PLACE?"

"WHO WAS PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES DURING THE EISENHOWER ADMINISTRATION?"

"WHAT IS THE MAIN INGREDIENT IN CREAM OF WHEAT?"

"MR. R., WOULD YOU LIKE A PIECE OF THIS HOT AND DELICIOUS HOMEMADE CHERRY PIE?"

"WHAT CITY DO THE MIAMA DOLPHINS PLAY IN?"

"THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES LIVES IN THE WHITE HOUSE. WHAT COLOR IS IT PAINTED?"

"WHAT IS THE PHONE NUMBER FOR 911?"

"HOW DO YOU SPELL F.B.I.?"

"WHAT MOUNTAIN RANGE DOES THE APPALACHIAN TRAIL GO THROUGH?"


THE END

1 comment:

Carolyn said...

Your list covers most of the classic stupid questions - I'd never heard the 911 phone number before and it's a good one! The one I mentioned was:

Who wrote the autobiography of Abraham Lincoln?

Then there are these:

How long did the Hundred Years War last?

How many halves are there in a football game?

What is a kidney bean shaped like?

But those last two are so bad I won't mention them, ok?

Keep them coming, Walter - I can use all the laughs that I can get!